turquoise trash (runawaygirl) wrote,
turquoise trash

goodgirls are really badgirls that haven't been found out yet

I am a SELF -CONFESSED snobby, egotistical, sarcastic bitch. I am always right! although sometimes, even if I don't say it-- I know that isn't true. I play fast&hard, talkin' rough with words too harsh         ( can you handle that? )       mad  DRIVEN  passionate  decadent  anti- authoritarian  unintentional: rebelwithoutacause.  xxxxx   abovebelowbeyond rules made to be broken /pushing EXTREMITIES .   [un?] reasonably insecure, even if you don't think so.  PERSISTENTLY st u bb or n, I only do what I want, when I want.   I have issues with PRIDE. ( i will not back down, even if I realise I am wrong. )   I am nice enough to people I know. I am much nicer to those I don 't: I tell strangers secrets I would NEVER tell even my closest! friends.   I have ridiculously HIGH standards I expect you and you and you to meet I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE &definitely much too judgemental .. . especially with myself.  I value my privacy- I hate people who DON'T KNOCK.         I ADORE my family. <3<3 <3       I respect people who don 't suppress their individuality for the sake of society's standards.   Don't tell me I don't feel the irrepressible need to BELONG too, honey.   "But you're stronger than I am."     Bullshit !!

ONE TIME HE HAD TOLD HER HE LOVED HER.   'Love? What does that mean? It's a logo like on the Coke can or on a packet of cheese. It's a generic brand name for sex.'   Humbly he had not said it again, because wasn't she right about it being the word plastered on anything and everything?
I don't know what to do with compliments. I never have. WHAT IS REAL IS NOT EXTERNAL BUT THE ESSENCE OF THINGS-- brancusi. It is true how they say that beauty is a matter of perception, because the girl in the mirror doesn't look any different to me. older, yes. wiser. more brash, more trash.   You could never tell how old she is, really-- not if you didn't know her.   6 -yr old, messy pigtails in a white tank top & jeans.     LOOK CLOSER. ( yr eyes give it all away. )   1921 -yr old, smouldering dark smoky eyes, armed with a lighter & kitten heels. I 've never felt like my age: what's 141516171819 to you ?     last friday:   lovelovelove to lynnie& kim, thankyou- yr absolute JEMS. <3   "happy sweet si x t ee n, darling: 1, 6, or 16- you'll always be my baby princess."   My Mom was so excited.   ( she doesn't know 1 /2 of the things I do )   daddy darling, however, doesn't know what to do with me anymore. He knows I can take care of myself but I think even that scares him beyond reason. parents are so cute.     yr a good girl, that's what makes me trust you. [ i've run out of words: that is all. ]
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